I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
