Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
