If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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