Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
