you traded sex for a burrito?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize