White coat. Heels.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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