I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I came so hard my ears popped.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
