I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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