if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
