I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
