So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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