I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
