How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Boobs speak an international language.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize