I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
