He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
