are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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