Will you blow on my dice?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
