Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
