if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
