Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I could fuck to npr.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
