My brain says no but my pants say off.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize