Whod you bang
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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