you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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