That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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