Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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