u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
tequila makes me forget i have legs
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
