I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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