yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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