we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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