i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
