I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Help. Why am I so naked?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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