That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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