how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
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