I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
