PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
