Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Every concussion has its silver lining
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Randomize
