So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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