I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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