so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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