Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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