Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Randomize
