Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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