But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
and she was petting her beer can
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
She needs sedatives and a leash
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I would fuck him just for his dog
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize