I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
