i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
