If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
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