I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize