oh fat girl friday strikes again...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize