I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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