in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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