Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
