...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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