New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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